Two. Three.. The dreaded.

It's been ages since I last wrote, I know.

I guess I could apologize.. or tell you the dreary winter got the best of me.

But the real reason is because I had no where to go after my last post.

Ya see that one, down there, under this one..

it created a lot of controversy.

I was praised for it and hated for it.

And not just by family members, per usual.. but by complete strangers.

It was all very new.

So I have racked my mind thinking of an equally opinionated and controversial topic I could rant about,

but I couldn't.

So I won't.

Instead, I'm gonna talk about something that everyone experiences every year.

Birthdays.

Boring, right?

Well not this year, not for me.

Now, let me preference this post by saying I am a Mormon,

I believe this.

Truly, madly, deeply I believe.

(Feel free to lift up my hair(real and fake) to search for my horns.. Promise you won't find them)

Now in exactly 43 days, I will be 23 years old.

There is a stigma in Utah, possibly an unwritten rule.. it seems to be known by all young LDS girls as they leave high school, bright eyed and worry free that they are now hunters.

The time has come to track down and capture their soul mate.

(It sounds a bit like the hunger games.. "May the odds be ever in your favor.")

And if you are about to reach your 23 birthday and you haven't roped your forever and always you have a few options..

Mission,

more schooling,

or leave Utah.

I am doing none of the above.

I remember sitting at the very first farewell of one of my friends,

all cute and naive in my too tight shade shirt and cherubic face(it took me a while to lose my baby fat)

thinking,

"Goodbye forever, because I will most likely be married to the man of my dreams by the time you get back, I may even have a child."

ha ha ha 

bless my poor, little heart. 

I don't know if I could possibly count how many times I have been asked,

"So.. what are you looking for exactly?"

I usually look at the inquirer with a furrowed brow and my head cocked a bit to the right for a moment, until I realize what they mean..

cause the answer that always comes up in my head is food.. I'm looking for food..

OH MEN.. what am I looking for in a man..

got it, got it.

I usually give them a basic, run of the mill answer.

But wanna know the truth?

I want to find MY man.

A man who is my foundation and my penthouse.

A man who will march me down to that gorgeous white castle and promise me forever, and ever.

Someone to laugh with,

cry with,

take naps with,

baths with,

stumble with,

have babies with,

and take on this nasty, scary world head on with.

That is what I am looking for, and that will happen exactly when it is supposed to.

So come on you dreaded twenty third,

show me what living is about.

xx,

m.